April 6, 2010

Dear Rielle,

I just got around to reading your interview in GQ. Much has been said about the pictures that accompanied the article. I'm not going to give you anymore flak about that. It's the content of the article that I found most baffling.

Anyone who has been single any length of time has likely experienced the unpleasant feeling that someone thinks we are a threat to their marriage. It doesn't have to be based on anything we have done - or failed to do. It almost always comes entirely from someone else's insecurities.

But then someone comes along and seems to give credence to those insecurities. Someone, well, like you.

It's not that I blame you, at least not entirely. We have all had our stupid moments when it comes to relationships. It's just that most single people choose other singles with whom to have those stupid moments.

Don't get me wrong. Your Johnny fooled lots of people. I was with a group of women shortly after he admitted that he was the father of your adorable daughter and one of the women said she used to look at him and think, "What a nice, clean-cut looking guy." She went on to say, "Now I look at him and just think, ICK."

You told GQ that Johnny doesn't lie to you. I have to tell you, that's hard to imagine since he seemed to lie so easily about you to the other 300+ million of us.

He spoke with such eloquence of two Americas that I can only imagine how persuasive he was when he told you about two Elizabeths. You spoke of "the wrath of Elizabeth." Do you understand that there's not a woman on the planet who doesn't understand that wrath? There's nothing you, or Johnny, or Andrew for that matter, can tell us about Elizabeth that we won't believe was totally justified on her part.

I feel bad for you. You genuinely seemed mystified as to why you have been cast as a villain in this. Did you not realize that marriages have ups and downs? Did you not realize that if things were as bad as he said, there were other ways for him to deal with it? Did you not realize that an affair is the coward's way out?

Those of us who were paying attention felt like we got to know Elizabeth during the 2004 campaign. Sure, it was a public persona, but still, we empathized with the mother who had buried a son. We admired her  determination to go through fertility treatments and two pregnancies in order to have more children at an age when many women are looking forward to grandchildren. We respected the woman who articulated her husband's position in interviews as well as - and sometime better than - the candidate himself. We prayed for her when she was diagnosed with breast cancer immediately following the 2004 election. The bottom line is this: not only did we feel like we knew Elizabeth, we liked her.

You didn't even recognize her husband as a former Vice Presidential candidate when you first saw him in 2006, a mere 2 years after his campaign ended.

If you didn't recognize such a recent candidate, I'm guessing you may not remember the story of another politician, Nelson Rockefeller. He also had a messy personal life, and a wife who had faced cancer. I'm not going to include the details here, but if you need a refresher, you can find plenty of details online. Suffice it to say, the messy personal life led to a messy ending for the former Vice President. There was the drip, drip of sordid details for weeks after his death, decades before 24/7 cable news.

I know you haven't asked for my advice, Rielle, but I'm going to offer it anyway. Cut your losses and move on. Johnny's not worth it.


  1. Just read the interview. This woman is quite delusional.

    I've known a few women like this in my life, who don't see anything wrong with hurting others as long as it feels nice to them. I never understood it.

    What I fail to understand also is how she's totally ok with him not being with her, and completely denying she exists, basically. She just laughs it off. He was very cruel to both women. How can you be in a relationship like that?

  2. Delusional is the best word for it. I think she honestly believes he loves her. Too bad she doesn't realize that the way he has treated her - and his family, for that matter - cannot be described as love.

  3. After reading that, I just feel very sad for everyone involved

  4. It's truly tragic for everyone. And sadly, the story is as old as time.