A couple of blogs I follow introduced me to Mama Kat's Writing Workshop this week. Mama Kat offered a choice of writing assignments, and I liked this one - List 10 rules you’ve unlearned. Since it's not for a grade, I'm taking an artistic liberty or two...instead of rules I've unlearned, my assignment is more along the line of 10 Absolutes That Aren't So Absolute After All.
THEN - Everyone gets married.
NOW - The jury's still out on this one.THEN - Cher has a daughter named Chastity.
NOW - Cher has a son named Chas.
THEN - Elvis is dead.
NOW - Or is he?
THEN - Jesus turned water into grape juice. (The Word according to the Baptist Bible)
NOW - Wine? Really? He turned water into wine? Well, now that changes the whole story.
THEN - Republicans are all northern (pronounced nawlun) liberals. (I spent a couple of years in Mississippi when I was growning up.)
NOW - Republicans are all southern conservatives.
THEN - Two things you'll never see at tea parties: men and guns.
NOW - Two things you'll never see at tea parties: scones and well, apparently tea.
THEN - Women never wear pants to church.
NOW - Sunday is the new casual Friday.
THEN - I don't sing well enough to sing out loud.
NOW - Don't worry that you're not good enough for anyone else to hear...just sing, sing a song!
THEN - Wow. $5.00 is a lot to pay for a movie!
NOW - Does anyone know where there's a bargain matinee for under $6.00?
THEN - It's disrespectful to sit on a representation of the flag.
NOW - Sorry, I'm not giving that one up. There's something about flag chairs that just doesn't sit right with me.
You gotta love Mama Kat's. I did this assignment too!
ReplyDelete# 2 & # 3 have me rolling on the floor!!! I hate that Chasity is now Chas...and the whole "Elvis sighting" stuff...hey...they won't let you go upstairs at Graceland - there has to be a better reason...Right?!
ReplyDeleteOh...the whole Sunday is the new casual Firday thing...irritates me..I know it shouldn't...but I really hate to see EVERYONE coming to church in ripped up jeans and a raggedy t-shirt. Especially those I know dressed to the nines to go out and party the night before ::raising eyebrows::
You know what I'm talking about!!!
It did annoy me that we couldn't see Graceland's 2nd floor. Really, what/who ARE they hiding up there?
ReplyDeleteI really don't mind the casual clothes on Sunday - it's nice to wear jeans when the weather's bad - but it does seem odd that we've done such a good job of making casual clothes acceptable that now I almost feel overdressed when I do wear a dress to church.
Clever assignment! I enjoyed them all, but got a particular giggle out of your "Elvis," "tea parties" and "Sunday is the new casual Friday!" :)
ReplyDelete